I'm off to play the grocery game in a few minutes. 3 of my kids have actually asked to come with me. At least one has wanted to come the last few times, which pretty much stuns me, because I loathed grocery shopping as a kid. Well, except at the ironically named "Dairy Lane" in Hong Kong (which, as far as I know carried no dairy products other than Klim and some ice cream) where my sis and I would go upstairs and read books like The Joy of Sex, or Sphinx (a trashy novel about a woman with 6 breasts), tucked into a LIFE magazine.
Speaking of shopping that I loathe, my favourite jeans have blown up. I have 2 pairs and they both blew out at the knee last week. :-( The ones I'm wearing right now also have a rip at the corner of one of the bum pockets. I can tell, because MuNKi keeps sticking his finger in it. All of this means that eventually I'm going to have to suck it up and buy new jeans. Which is basically pure torture for me. I SO envy guys, who can fall in love with a pair of jeans and still be able to buy the same exact ones 30 years later. AND they can buy them to length. SO not fair. Sigh.
If only I could go upstairs and read smutty books while someone else bought my jeans for me. . .
*****
UPDATE : I won again at the Grocery Game. Today's stats:
$280.64 worth of groceries for $97.51. Huzzah! I saved $183.13, which is close to twice as much as I spent! :-)
Showing posts with label whingeing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label whingeing. Show all posts
Sunday, February 03, 2008
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Uhhnnnh
The flu. I has it.
So not fun.
Without tea I would be dead.
At least it's not a stomach thing, and for that I am eternally grateful.
So not fun.
Without tea I would be dead.
At least it's not a stomach thing, and for that I am eternally grateful.
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Deep Thoughts
So I'm at the library, making judicious use of my enforced computer/writing time by checking my Scrabulous games, putting books on hold and blogging. Just now, I tried to put an audio recording of The Wee Free Men on hold, but the system didn't allow it. (Some libraries are selfish bastards and won't share with ours.) The computer popped up a screen informing me "Hold Not Allowed" and presented me with only one option: the OK button. But it is most definitely Not OK that they are a collection of selfish bastards who won't share with me when I Really, Really Want to hear this book. Honestly, what am I supposed to do? Push the OK button, even though it's Not OK? Throw a screaming hissy on the library floor? Navigate away and blog about it?
Also, when a math problem works out to something like "7= (-156)" isn't that technically a paradox? And aren't paradoxes rather earth-shattering events? They were in every Dr. Who episode I every saw. Imagine my surprise to find us all still here.
Also, when a math problem works out to something like "7= (-156)" isn't that technically a paradox? And aren't paradoxes rather earth-shattering events? They were in every Dr. Who episode I every saw. Imagine my surprise to find us all still here.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Picture Book Thursday
So yesterday I was at the library and I thought I'd snag some picture books for Prawn. How can I accurately describe the mood in which that put me? I'll try by saying that I would LOVE to find books that are real STORIES that I want to read to my five-year-old for the purpose of enjoyment, as opposed to thinly veiled MESSAGES. But I'm afraid that the Otts Children's Publishing Theme Song would be "We're Bringin' Didact Back." :-P
I can't tell you how unlikely it is that if you pull a random book out of the hundreds on our library's shelves it will be an actual story book. I'm fed up with "Little Johnny is Sad," and "Merwin Recycles a Can." I've had it with "Hattie's Grandma Got Diagnosed With Cancer and then Got Run Over by a Bus," and "Jory Ate a Day-Old Chicken Sandwich and Died." Enough, please of "Charles Was Petrified of Going to School, but it Turned Out not to Kill Him After All," and "The Dentist is My Friend in Spite of all the Horrifying Instruments of Torture He Keeps On Hand" and "Harry Finds a Dead Frog," and "My Fish Died, but He Makes Great Fertilizer."
Granted, there is a time and a place for some of these, but more often than not, parents are looking for something to read that will delight their little ones and feed their imaginations -- something that makes their kids giggle or "oooh" and "aah," and then run off to build castles and dance with fairies and paint pictures and pretend they can fly. And also preferably something they can read more than once without barfing. This is getting increasingly harder to do.
So I was delighted yesterday to find "I'm the Biggest Thing in the Ocean." It's a simple book with a great punchline and a couple of cute little gags for the visually observant. It made all my kids laugh, and BG and me, too. I found a few others that look Less Than Awful as well. I'll keep you posted.
I can't tell you how unlikely it is that if you pull a random book out of the hundreds on our library's shelves it will be an actual story book. I'm fed up with "Little Johnny is Sad," and "Merwin Recycles a Can." I've had it with "Hattie's Grandma Got Diagnosed With Cancer and then Got Run Over by a Bus," and "Jory Ate a Day-Old Chicken Sandwich and Died." Enough, please of "Charles Was Petrified of Going to School, but it Turned Out not to Kill Him After All," and "The Dentist is My Friend in Spite of all the Horrifying Instruments of Torture He Keeps On Hand" and "Harry Finds a Dead Frog," and "My Fish Died, but He Makes Great Fertilizer."
Granted, there is a time and a place for some of these, but more often than not, parents are looking for something to read that will delight their little ones and feed their imaginations -- something that makes their kids giggle or "oooh" and "aah," and then run off to build castles and dance with fairies and paint pictures and pretend they can fly. And also preferably something they can read more than once without barfing. This is getting increasingly harder to do.
So I was delighted yesterday to find "I'm the Biggest Thing in the Ocean." It's a simple book with a great punchline and a couple of cute little gags for the visually observant. It made all my kids laugh, and BG and me, too. I found a few others that look Less Than Awful as well. I'll keep you posted.
Sunday, July 01, 2007
All Shall Be Well
The kids are LOVING that $30 swingset. I'm so happy. :)
And yesterday we went cherry and strawberry picking with good friends, first stopping by our TKD Master's house to see their freshly-hatched baby quail. (OMG sooooooo cute!) One of the babies hatched while we were there. Mollusc (ever-patient and ever-vigilant) stayed at the incubator while we were checking out the progress of all the fruit trees in the yard, and she got to watch him come out of the shell. Wow! :)
When we got home, a bill was waiting for us from the tax man for summer property taxes, and can I just say, "GULP!"
So it's a good thing we splurged on that fun stuff when we did, because it's belt-tightening time from here on out. You know, I don't mind paying for the roads (though it would be nice if they were better maintained) and I don't mind paying for the library (though I pay cash over and above taxes for the priviledge of using our local library) and there are a few other things I find acceptable, but it ticks me off that the people who reassess the value of your house (whenever they find it convenient -- i.e. when they want more $ ) are the ones who stand to gain from that reassessment. So it doesn't matter that houses here in MI don't sell for anywhere near what you paid for them, and that you have to keep your house on the market for at least a year in order to sell it; they still raise the assessment value. :-/
I have a new motto:
"All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well." ~St. Julian of Norwich (who, by the way, was a chick.)
And yesterday we went cherry and strawberry picking with good friends, first stopping by our TKD Master's house to see their freshly-hatched baby quail. (OMG sooooooo cute!) One of the babies hatched while we were there. Mollusc (ever-patient and ever-vigilant) stayed at the incubator while we were checking out the progress of all the fruit trees in the yard, and she got to watch him come out of the shell. Wow! :)
When we got home, a bill was waiting for us from the tax man for summer property taxes, and can I just say, "GULP!"
So it's a good thing we splurged on that fun stuff when we did, because it's belt-tightening time from here on out. You know, I don't mind paying for the roads (though it would be nice if they were better maintained) and I don't mind paying for the library (though I pay cash over and above taxes for the priviledge of using our local library) and there are a few other things I find acceptable, but it ticks me off that the people who reassess the value of your house (whenever they find it convenient -- i.e. when they want more $ ) are the ones who stand to gain from that reassessment. So it doesn't matter that houses here in MI don't sell for anywhere near what you paid for them, and that you have to keep your house on the market for at least a year in order to sell it; they still raise the assessment value. :-/
I have a new motto:
"All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well." ~St. Julian of Norwich (who, by the way, was a chick.)
Thursday, April 05, 2007
Good Fun that is Funny
Well, I've had my fun, and I think quite a few of you enjoyed the page. And now, for your further edification, I present this fascinating article, which my sister sent in an attempt to disabuse me of the notion that water is harmful. (I can never keep a straight face in person, but I can through email ^_^ )
After our 70-some degree Tuesday, we had snow yesterday. There's still a dusting of it out there. Jack Frost can bite me. To quote Morticia Addams (upon turning the page in The Cat in the Hat) "Oh no. He lives."
After our 70-some degree Tuesday, we had snow yesterday. There's still a dusting of it out there. Jack Frost can bite me. To quote Morticia Addams (upon turning the page in The Cat in the Hat) "Oh no. He lives."
Sunday, April 01, 2007
The One Without a Title, Least of All a Clever One
We went to Barnes and Noble today. This is always dangerous. I nearly bought a $26.00 book, but managed to stop myself with thoughts of trying the library first. Sadly, I cannot remember the title. :-P I did, however, succumb to The King in the Window. "For the children." The idea is intriguing, the writing, so far as I saw, is well-done, and I like that there are little bites of French sprinkled throughout. I'm going to start reading it to the kids at bedtime, since we are still working through the Pure Dead____ books in the morning (alternating with a history book, and thus drawing things out.)
I tried to find a decent picture book for the Prawn, but the sad fact is that all that seems to come out in the picture book realm these days is tripe. There are plenty of and then. . . and then. . . and then. . . books, and more than enough it was like a banana but moldy and green, I learned with surprise that the thing was my spleen books (OK, well, even that is more creative than what I saw today,) but nothing in the way of depth or beauty; nothing I could be prevailed upon to read even twice (or once!) let alone a hundred times. I know, I know, "Stop whingeing and get off your butt and make some good ones!" you say. And you're right. As much as I loathe the submission process, I need to suck it up and launch some more of my babies out there into the cold, harsh world of uncaring publishing houses once again. But the cynical side of me -- the part I try to keep locked in the small, dark compartment under my lower left rib (though this part requires, with increasing frequency, bribery in the form of chocolate and baked goods in order to stay put) -- says that this predominantly television-dependent age consists largely (though not completely) of parents who don't want picturesque and meaningful; who prefer something they can read with three quarters of their brains tied behind their backs and in the minimum possible time. I suspect that they desire books that will never present a word that calls for a moment's pause for explanation, books that are composed of trite rhymes (or almost-but-not-quite rhymes) and splashed with garish, unrealistic stick-figure drawings.
Clearly I need more chocolate.
On that note, I was looking for an appropriate dessert recipe to try today. MuNKi speculated that vanilla cupcakes might be nice, but was met by a resounding chorus of disgust. (Clearly, I've taught my children well.) So I pulled out my Culinary Arts Institute Encyclopedic Cookbook (purchased at one of those "fill a bag for $2" library sales -- mine once beonged to "Rosemary" which I take as a good sign) and began thumbing through it for the first time. Much to my interest and amusement, I've found a Libby's label with a pumpkin pie recipe, an old strip of check stub (the kind from those big ledger-style business checks) with some ingredients listed on it, and an old (I almost said ancient, but it's not quite that) Farmington Community Library bookmark/information strip explaining the new barcode system in very comforting and reassuring terms. ("We call it the Zebra.") Section headers are printed in an amazingly nerdy computer font. Oooooohhhh! Obviously, all this is designed to disguise the fact that the system is Satanic.
I obviously got sidetracked by all that. Now I'm going to look for an actual recipe. I suppose a fool would be approriate, but I doubt that's going to happen. I'll let you know if I find anything else of interest, like recipes from the 1800s or pressed flowers/pickles/lapdogs.
I tried to find a decent picture book for the Prawn, but the sad fact is that all that seems to come out in the picture book realm these days is tripe. There are plenty of and then. . . and then. . . and then. . . books, and more than enough it was like a banana but moldy and green, I learned with surprise that the thing was my spleen books (OK, well, even that is more creative than what I saw today,) but nothing in the way of depth or beauty; nothing I could be prevailed upon to read even twice (or once!) let alone a hundred times. I know, I know, "Stop whingeing and get off your butt and make some good ones!" you say. And you're right. As much as I loathe the submission process, I need to suck it up and launch some more of my babies out there into the cold, harsh world of uncaring publishing houses once again. But the cynical side of me -- the part I try to keep locked in the small, dark compartment under my lower left rib (though this part requires, with increasing frequency, bribery in the form of chocolate and baked goods in order to stay put) -- says that this predominantly television-dependent age consists largely (though not completely) of parents who don't want picturesque and meaningful; who prefer something they can read with three quarters of their brains tied behind their backs and in the minimum possible time. I suspect that they desire books that will never present a word that calls for a moment's pause for explanation, books that are composed of trite rhymes (or almost-but-not-quite rhymes) and splashed with garish, unrealistic stick-figure drawings.
Clearly I need more chocolate.
On that note, I was looking for an appropriate dessert recipe to try today. MuNKi speculated that vanilla cupcakes might be nice, but was met by a resounding chorus of disgust. (Clearly, I've taught my children well.) So I pulled out my Culinary Arts Institute Encyclopedic Cookbook (purchased at one of those "fill a bag for $2" library sales -- mine once beonged to "Rosemary" which I take as a good sign) and began thumbing through it for the first time. Much to my interest and amusement, I've found a Libby's label with a pumpkin pie recipe, an old strip of check stub (the kind from those big ledger-style business checks) with some ingredients listed on it, and an old (I almost said ancient, but it's not quite that) Farmington Community Library bookmark/information strip explaining the new barcode system in very comforting and reassuring terms. ("We call it the Zebra.") Section headers are printed in an amazingly nerdy computer font. Oooooohhhh! Obviously, all this is designed to disguise the fact that the system is Satanic.
I obviously got sidetracked by all that. Now I'm going to look for an actual recipe. I suppose a fool would be approriate, but I doubt that's going to happen. I'll let you know if I find anything else of interest, like recipes from the 1800s or pressed flowers/pickles/lapdogs.
Friday, March 23, 2007
If Wishes Were Horses
****************
A completely drunken sot was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and said, "I've got to take you in, mate. You're obviously drunk."
Our wasted friend asked, "Officer, are ya absolutely sure I'm drunk?"
"Yeah, buddy, I'm sure," said the copper. "Let's go."
Breathing a sigh of relief, the drunk said, "Thank goodness, I thought I was crippled."
****************
A few facts:
-Wish I were only drunk. Of course, I could get wasted, but then I'd just be a drunken cripple. ^_^
-I don't advise ever doing something that causes you to require crutches, because they make your armpits sore.
And yes, I do actually appreciate (very much) what MuNKi is doing for me. But it's still fun to carp about it.
One of my ankle bones has mysteriously vanished, and that's kinda weird. I'm pretty intimate with a bag of Trader Joe's frozen peas at this point.
I have all the hope in the world of making a rapid (or at least semi-rapid) recovery from this, but in case my foot falls off, I'm pretty sure what my next occupation is going to be. Just call me Captain Pegleg. ^_^
A completely drunken sot was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and said, "I've got to take you in, mate. You're obviously drunk."
Our wasted friend asked, "Officer, are ya absolutely sure I'm drunk?"
"Yeah, buddy, I'm sure," said the copper. "Let's go."
Breathing a sigh of relief, the drunk said, "Thank goodness, I thought I was crippled."
****************
A few facts:
-Wish I were only drunk. Of course, I could get wasted, but then I'd just be a drunken cripple. ^_^
-I don't advise ever doing something that causes you to require crutches, because they make your armpits sore.
-Stairs have never struck me as a particularly formidable obstacle before now. Amazing how such a small distance can become such a huge barrier.
-My sister and I bought 2 pairs of wooden crutches from Goodwill when we were about 12 and 15. We invented all kind of games to play on crutches. Most involved rollerskates and a tennis ball. I have to say that crutches are a lot more fun when they're optional. ^_^
-Several people have nearly incapacitated themselves playing with my crutches.-Retail therapy really does make me feel better. The first day, I bought a Korean DVD. Today it was homeschooling stuff. Oooh, and Matin Latin, and other fun things from The Book Peddler.
My ankle definitely does NOT feel worse, and I think it feels slightly better. Of course MuNKi is not letting me do anything fun. It's like living with the Gestapo. ;) I have to say, though, that it's pretty lovely to just saunter (read hobble/hop/crutch) off after a meal and leave the clean-up to others whilst feeling pretty guilt-free about the whole thing.
And yes, I do actually appreciate (very much) what MuNKi is doing for me. But it's still fun to carp about it.
One of my ankle bones has mysteriously vanished, and that's kinda weird. I'm pretty intimate with a bag of Trader Joe's frozen peas at this point.
I have all the hope in the world of making a rapid (or at least semi-rapid) recovery from this, but in case my foot falls off, I'm pretty sure what my next occupation is going to be. Just call me Captain Pegleg. ^_^
Friday, March 09, 2007
My Word
I've decided to live on the edge. I'm turning off word verification. How many minutes/hours/days/weeks/years/decades/centuries/millenia/eons before the next Spam?
We did the 3 bag kicking thing in red belt class tonight. Three kicking bags (last photo) are lined up in a row, we run at them (shouting various Kamikaze slogans) and jump up and try to kick all 3 in a row. I hate this. OK, well, I don't hate it. I just hate the frustration it produces in me. I hate feeling inept. Especially in front of other people. MuNKi sometimes tells me I'm athletic. I don't know about that. I just know that physical stuff isn't supposed to be terribly hard by the 3rd or 4th try. When it comes to three bag kicking, I am not athletic in the least. If I jump high enough, I don't turn sideways enough, if I turn sideways enough, I don't kick hard enough to hit the third bag, if I think about kicking the first bag on the way up, I forget my name and how to land. Plus, I need to Kegel more.
Hee hee! The DVD menu for Big Fish is playing on the wall and Emmett is going NUTS trying to catch the big, animated bee. Muahahahahaha!! >^_^<
We did the 3 bag kicking thing in red belt class tonight. Three kicking bags (last photo) are lined up in a row, we run at them (shouting various Kamikaze slogans) and jump up and try to kick all 3 in a row. I hate this. OK, well, I don't hate it. I just hate the frustration it produces in me. I hate feeling inept. Especially in front of other people. MuNKi sometimes tells me I'm athletic. I don't know about that. I just know that physical stuff isn't supposed to be terribly hard by the 3rd or 4th try. When it comes to three bag kicking, I am not athletic in the least. If I jump high enough, I don't turn sideways enough, if I turn sideways enough, I don't kick hard enough to hit the third bag, if I think about kicking the first bag on the way up, I forget my name and how to land. Plus, I need to Kegel more.
Hee hee! The DVD menu for Big Fish is playing on the wall and Emmett is going NUTS trying to catch the big, animated bee. Muahahahahaha!! >^_^<
Keeping Mum
GuTTer MuNKi and I watched this on Wednedsay night and enjoyed it thoroughly. Though it's not the knee-slapping, tear-streaming sort of funny, it's that lovely chuckling with the occasional explosive HA! sort of funny, which I love. Except that it hurts to laugh because something inside my chest gave way 2 Tuesdays ago during sparring. But that may have gotten kicked back into alignment last night, because this morning it seems to be quite a lot better. In which case, I may have to watch the movie again. ^_^
I got Big Fish at the library yesterday. Has anyone seen it? One of the TKD dads (with whom I trade book titles - we have similar tates) said it was good, so I figured I'd check it out. I also got The Heart of Me, and Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam. Oh, and I have Serenity waiting in the wings. The beauty of getting films at the library is that you can pick a bunch of different stuff to watch depending on your mood, and if you never get around to watching some of them, it doesn't matter since they're free!
I was awoken this morning by what sounded like someone banging on the neighbour's roof, and was immediately reminded of Logo. I looked out the window to see what was going on, but what that shocking spectre was, I'm not saying. ^_^
I got Big Fish at the library yesterday. Has anyone seen it? One of the TKD dads (with whom I trade book titles - we have similar tates) said it was good, so I figured I'd check it out. I also got The Heart of Me, and Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam. Oh, and I have Serenity waiting in the wings. The beauty of getting films at the library is that you can pick a bunch of different stuff to watch depending on your mood, and if you never get around to watching some of them, it doesn't matter since they're free!
I was awoken this morning by what sounded like someone banging on the neighbour's roof, and was immediately reminded of Logo. I looked out the window to see what was going on, but what that shocking spectre was, I'm not saying. ^_^
Sunday, February 18, 2007
Clinging to Sanity
Adobe hates me. I can tell, because after spending 3 days on a silly little slideshow, it won't let me burn the blasted thing to DVD. Rather than performing as advertised, the program informs me that I should go to hell while it shuts down. And it won't let me port it to another computer without making me go into the picture folders and pointing out all 147 pictures one by one (if I could even find them all again.) For some reason when I export to Windows Media, all video gets dropped (though the audio is great.) Quicktime fares better, but the sound sucks the bag. And the timing get thrown off a bit. And it's still too big to email or upload anyway.
My friend said today that her sis (an Adobe honcho) gets all kinds of hate mail. I told her that I totally understand why. ^_^
I have learned some valuable things from this exercise in futility:
- no matter how high tech a program might appear to be, I will be the one who needs the one seemingly simple little thing that it cannot do
- never try to build anything with Adobe Premiere Elements on the left-hand computer again
- make a tiny little 3 second movie as a test, rather than a 4:24 one
- anything else I may have learned has been replaced by a bad word starting with "F" and every time I attempt to access that portion of my memory, that's all that comes to mind
Somehow tomorrow is going to be Monday again already. How does that happen?
Oh, on a far happier note, Going Great White had a blurb in the WI State Journal today. Clearly Frank and Frank are having more success with Adobe than I am. ^_^
My friend said today that her sis (an Adobe honcho) gets all kinds of hate mail. I told her that I totally understand why. ^_^
I have learned some valuable things from this exercise in futility:
- no matter how high tech a program might appear to be, I will be the one who needs the one seemingly simple little thing that it cannot do
- never try to build anything with Adobe Premiere Elements on the left-hand computer again
- make a tiny little 3 second movie as a test, rather than a 4:24 one
- anything else I may have learned has been replaced by a bad word starting with "F" and every time I attempt to access that portion of my memory, that's all that comes to mind
Somehow tomorrow is going to be Monday again already. How does that happen?
Oh, on a far happier note, Going Great White had a blurb in the WI State Journal today. Clearly Frank and Frank are having more success with Adobe than I am. ^_^
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)