Honestly

If I see one more Postman Pat reference in the next 24 hours, I think I may just lose it. I mean, really, WTF??

Oh, and apparently "they" have just discovered a nude portrait of Mozart.

Oh. New?

Whatever.

Picturesque

Two bees

or


not two bees


Wheeze the juice, bud-DY! (LMK if you catch THAT obscure reference ^_^ )


Yeah, I like bees


and attempting to freeze them mid-flight.


going to get Mollusc's ears pierced -- a little nervous


a little jealous :)


a little more nervous


"One. . . Two. . . FIVE!"


Happy :)


more not Susans


a random sticky note I found that I suspect was written by The Prawn, given the subject matter


I thought that MuNKi was insufficiently Star Wars Geeky until he surprised us with this. OK, he's still not all that Star Wars Geeky, but he sure knows how to make those of us who ARE very, very happy! ^_^


I found this particularly amusing, given one of the suggestions for Diesel's caption contest this week. ^_^


Utah is still morphing.


I used a random stripping technique my friend's mom showed us for this one.


I love the Autumn leaves fabric in the borders on this one. I keep finding myself drawn to fabrics by a couple of designers, even when I have no clue who did them.


Seeing a theme in fabrics here?






one of my faves

I have some four patch and nine patch blocks, too, but all those pics had some digital funkitivity going on.

And finally, the first book I chose at the library book sale yesterday. I cannot freaking believe they had this, or that it was even made. Some of you may remember my discussion of how the kids like to watch this movie when MuNKi is out of town -- primarily (I suspect) because our tradition is to start it at midnight, and it's a three hour movie. ^_^ Perhaps we'll be uploading some more YouTubes soon. . .

Girly Shit

So I hung out with my friend BG (Boobies Galore - a mutually agreed upon moniker ^_^) and her kids today at the pool and at home, and we laughed ourselves silly over various raunchy things. It was good to have some girly time like that.

When we got to the house, there was a special surprise waiting for us: a catalog called As We Change. I mean, what is that? Clothes? Uh, no. It's a very pansy-assed allusion to menopause. How does one get on these lists?

"Who on earth would wear a bra like that?!" (pick your poison)

This was one of BG's first comments, and I have to say she's right. I mean, sure, if you wanted giant-ass, triple-armoured boobie bags to hold your breastages and nipple hiders, maybe. But you can tell from the models' faketastic grins that they're thinking "I can't believe I'm wearing this monstrosity. How much longer will I be in this hell, and where's my damn check?"

I find the nipple hiders particularly ironic, since other catalogues sell fake nipples to produce exactly the opposite effect. Which is silly, because anyone can tell you that 10 years of breastfeeding can produce this effect for absolutely no money at all. Duh.

Other things they feel I may be desirous of purchasing include:

~ Slimming garments, because I want to look sexy while simultaneously trying to convince men that I have no nipples

~a scarf that has pockets and will clip onto my beltloops, because I'm going to get dementia and either lose track of my scarf (in which I had conveniently stored all or most of my Earthly belongings) or accidentally strangle myself with it if I don't secure it to my person. Then again, with that bra on, strangulation could be just the thing.

~silicone boobie enhancers because I want men to admire my giant-ass, nippleless breasts. The giant-ass bras will hold more cookies, so why not buy a 6 pack?

~Breast lifts that will make my boobs appear to be floating, and additionally move them out to the sides in case I get tired of being able to use my arms. Raising the nippleless area is important.

~a supplement called VasoRect; a word clearly made of the root words "vaso" (blood vessel) and "rectum," which is a root I don't really want to associate with blood

~Plenty of sex enhancement stuff in case I actually bag a nipple-hating man

~a cheese grater for my feet, in case I suddenly need tacos and can't find any dairy products

~ointment and bandages to repair the damage

~a vibrator that looks like a lipstick Considering that I now have dementia, this means that I also own lipsticks that look like a vibrator. I smell trouble. And possibly an awkward explanation at the gynecologist's office.

~"hair removal from head to toe" so I can get rid of the hair that is only going to cause me trouble, and do something about those unsightly Hobbit feet.

~ the FPT, because your physical therapist wants you to have one

and finally, something to boost Brain Power. Counterproductive, IMO. Wouldn't that discourage repeat orders?

Unbef*inglievable!

I really am not sure that words can do justice to last night's adventure. I told MuNKi that if I'd seen it in a movie, it SO would have ruined the whole "suspension of disbelief" thing, because it's just that unbelievable.

Last night MuNKi called me from the gas station to ask if I could I bring his work Jeep and the backup set of van keys because Cyd (our van) wasn't starting. The gas station is pretty close, so I didn't really think about putting on shoes (a shoe, LOL!) or a jacket. I've never driven the Jeep before (it's not ours) but it was relatively easy to figure out and I got to the gas station quickly and parked right beside MuNKi.

So I'm sitting there, having handed MuNKi the second set of keys to try, but it's not the keys that are the problem; the ignition switch has locked up.

At this point, the Jeep sputters and stops running. Seriously. I gape at MuNKi and then look at the gas gage, which is on E. No problem - we're at a gas station, right. The pumps are close. I can steer while MuNKi pushes. I thank our lucky stars. But MunKi insists there is gas in the tank, so I try to start the Jeep and sure enough, the needle flutters upwards, but the engine doesn't turn over. MuNKi tries. No dice. I try Cyd. No luck. MuNKi keeps trying the Jeep. No.

We are in a technology black hole - like in Tomb Raider. ^_^ Except the cell phone works, so after about 13 misdials (hey, I never call myself at home, OK?) I finally get it right and tell the kids we'll be a few minutes longer and not to worry.

I'm laughing my butt off at the ridiculousness of the problem, though truth be told, startng to get a little freaked out that nature has conspired to strand us at the gas station while the children are home alone. Because, really, how bizarre is that? I tell MuNKi I'm going home. He is dubious. I am thankful I bothered to bring the crutches instead of just hopping to the Jeep. MuNKi doesn't want me crutching down the gravel shoulder of the busy road. With no shoe/s. He keeps trying to start the Jeep. I can't stop laughing at the outrageousness of our situation, but I need to get home to the kids. I nearly mutiny. But then the Jeep sputters and coughs to life. (MuNKi has been trying for about 10 minutes) The groceries are still in Cyd, but we don't dare stop the (hiccuping) Jeep, so I (against MuNKi's wishes) hop back and forth from Cyd to the Jeep with grocery bags while he revs the engine. We make it home alive. Hallelujah Jaffar! I am grateful. ^_^

There are so many things that could have gone (more) wrong. If we had gone into Ann Arbor or Brighton yesterday, we could have been stuck there and had to call a (very pricey) taxi and deal with car seats and all that stuff. Or it could have waited until the kids and I got to TKD today, stranding us there. While a 2 mile walk home wouldn't have been a huge deal on a normal day, it would have been harder for me in my gimpy state. Especially with trying to keep track of the littles and being unable to hold their hands.

So, all things told, I'm very grateful it happened when it did. And now, here's the song that won't stop running through my head.