My Life as a Volunteer

I got another book to review, and to my pleasant surprise, it's really good so far. This one's called Peter and Beth and is By Doug Lalli. I don't get paid for these, but I do get to keep the books. :-)

The last one, as you may remember, was not so good. In fact, as you may or may not recall, the writing sucked. Grammatical errors, redundancy, contradictions and over-dramatisations abounded. Here's a small excerpt:

We both looked up at the house in silence for several moments. I realized my perception on it already shifted. Maybe it was the fact that sun had lowered a little and the light was no longer gleaming on the glass, but it seemed a little darker now, colder. I wasn't nearly as impressed as I was when I first saw it. . .

Yes, at least 3 grammatical errors in just that little passage. Sigh. Oh, yes, when the protagonist first saw the house, she "heard the familiar 'click' of the door as it unlocked." Stuff like that. On every page. It's a shame, really. And no, I'm not disclosing the title here, because I think that would be mean.

Anyway, I'm very excited to be reading and enjoying Peter and Beth. :-)

In other highly rewarding volunteer work, you all know by now that I got to be an extra in my friend Frank's (4th musical down the list) mockumentary. (Dude, when are you going to cough up your site so I can link you?) This film is going to be a scream, and I can't wait to see it. I'm not going to say much about it until Frank tells me what all I can mention. Or maybe Frank will finally login and tell you himself. OK, probably not. He's a very busy guy. (No pressure, Frank. I'm messing with you. Except for that site link thing.)

Being involved had a few great benes (bennies?) Number One: we got to see the always charming Frank. He's a very fun and energetic guy. Reminds me a lot of my dad, actually. Also easy on the eyes. Shh. Don't tell him I said that. Number Two: we got a look at behind-the-scenes filmmaking and hopefully took away some stuff that will help us in our own endeavours. Number Three: it was really fun and we got to meet some fascinating people, and Number Four: Dude, it might go to Sundance. How cool would it be to be lurking in the background in a film that went to Sundance? I guess I could also count getting to see the inside of GuTTer MuNKi's (and Kevin J. Anderson's - a school chum of MuNKi's) and Frank's and SIL's alma mater, but as this took place in the somewhat recently scabbed-on atrocity (the inside is nice, but the outside is ugly as sin) I don't think that counts.

So what was it like? First off, I'm Miss Unprepared. Or maybe Mrs. Unprepared would better indicate the magnitute of my lack of preparedness. Had I been a Boy Scout, for instance, I would have emailed or called Frank before we left and asked if he would be shooting while we were there. (I already knew he was filming in July and August.) Then I would have brought appropriate clothing along. But no. Well, actually, I guess it was kind of a sudden decision that we made about going on the trip. And come to think of it, I don't have anything like "business dress" anyway. *shrug* So I hit the resale shop out by MIL and FIL's and found an ensemble that I actually really, really like (and a sexy red dress, too, as it turns out) and everything was 40% off the already very decent prices, so all in all, this was a good thing. :-) Hooray! Obviously my wardrobe could benefit from my taking up extra work as a full-time hobby. Have I ever mentioned that I am not a clothes-horse? I have a shelf in the closet and a few hanging things. The rest belongs to GuTTer MuNKi. Oh, and a bit of it is Prawn's.

Anyway. I didn't find shoes and had only brought sandals on the trip (I'm a barefoot girl for the most part) but as it turns out, my surprisingly shorter-than-me SIL has the same size feet that I do. And an incredible wardobe. Heh Heh. She loaned me a pair of black heels (Oh yes, I was the Tower of Babel in those shoes) that had some designer chick's name inside and that were purported to be very pricey shoes (given to her, fortunately, by a friend, so I wasn't too freaked out about borrowing them.) I'm not sure what that says about either of our feet, BTW. Hers don't seem too large on her, and mine don't look too small on me. Maybe there's a very boring scientific explanation for that. At any rate, I was immediately complimented on her shoes when I got there, LOL! Somehow I managed to stand, and yea (the Biblical "yea," not "yeah") even walk in the shoes. I was impressed. I don't think anyone else really was. Most people take this sort of thing (the ability of women to perambulate in high heels) for granted, but tall girls like me do not like to emphasize our towerosity, so we don't tend to wear skyscraper heels a whole lot. Needless to say, my practice at walking in such things is very nearly nil. My toes went to sleep almost immediately.

All this chatter, and I've only gotten as far as the dressing-up fun. Number Five: I got to play dress-up. Did I mention that I've never quite finished growing up? Well, this is long enough that some people **coughEgancough** are going to get bored without any pics to ogle, so I guess I'll do more blathering about life as an extra-special person tomorrow.

Home Again, Home Again

We're home and I'm attempting the recovery phase now. You know what that means - unpacking, heaps of laundry, going through a jillion pieces of mail, etc.

A couple of months ago I slapped something up on my secret blog and GuTTer MuNKi expressed a desire that I send it to a certain mag. Just to humour him I did so. It wasn't well written, IMO, and I think I was probably drunk when I did it, but after going through some of the mail last night, he showed it to me in the magazine. Well, well, well. They changed MuNKi's fake name to a different fake name and gave me fake initials and a fake location (kind of as per my request - I'd asked to be published under some sort of pseudonymn at any rate) but there it is in print. In a shiny, real magazine that hundreds of thousands of people read. Go figure.

Maybe this evening I'll be recovered enough from unpacking to post the fun details about my life as an extra. It was really a blast, and I can't wait to see the film! :-)

You Know You're F----d When. . .

I have a bad feeling about this.

Today is the impending return of the ILs. It could happen at any moment. They get up really early to drive, you see. I should be looking for things to clean even now. Although the last time they returned to a sparkling clean kitchen, MIL honestly seemed pissed that there was nothing to complain about. I kid you not.

This morning I showered as soon as I woke up, in order to get the hell out of the upstairs bathroom (FIL's) before they returned. A couple of the little girls had showered in there yesterday, and there were some splats of pink conditioner on the wall. I had noticed a device on the shower wall earlier that looked like a miniature water cooler. Peering 'round the back had revealed part of a label depicting those little scrubbing bubble guys, so I determined that this was some sort of cleanser. (Have I mentioned that MIL is a sucker for any sort of gadget ever invented?) Perfect. I could use this stuff to tidy up the shower a bit. I couldn't really tell where it came out, but there was a nozzle-looking protuberance at the bottom around the back. Strange placement, but OK. Pressing the blue button, I studied the contrivance for signs of emerging cleanser to no avail. Hmmm. I pushed the button a couple of more times. And then it hit me. Right in the eyes that is. A fine stream of those little scrubbing bastards shot right into my eyes. Both eyes, as it happens, because it turns out that the damn thing rotates back and forth as it shoots out its vile stream of caustic poison. I scrabbled to reach the shower nozzle (which I had turned on for cleaning purposes) so I could turn it off and get the hell out of Dodge, and - you guessed it - got it again. Shit. I uttered a mild expletive, ran to the sink and washed my eyes over and over again. The left one's still a bit pink.

GuTTer MuNKi asks how absurd is it that though most (innocuous) products are plastered with dire warnings, this one has nothing?

I have a bad feeling about what this day holds in store for me.

PSA Day

Here's something cool: Acne Zapping Light Pen

Today, among other things, we went to Maurie's and stocked up on orgasmic chocolates.

It rained like gangbusters last night (tornado warnings, even though none were sighted - how does that work?!?!?) and the kids were all out in the greenway today playing in the resulting stream/chain of ponds. It bucketed down again today. On the way home we saw a wreck involving 3 cars and a bus. One of the cars had slammed into the side of the bus. Pieces everywhere. The roads were flooded up over the gutters and onto the sidewalks in places, and the hwy was very, very hydroplanic. (new word)

I watched Because of Winn-Dixie with the kids, which was amazingly good for Hollywood, but not as sweet as the book, and after they all headed downstairs, SIL and I watched The Island with MuNKi and made lecherous remarks about Ewan McGregor and Sean Bean. We FFwded through a lot of the slow bits. Actually, my sis was here for a bit of it, too, but she's been sick lately (possibly Fifth's Disease) and had to head off early. Then it was on to our favourite: The Boondock Saints (yes, again!) during which we were forced to quote along with all our favourite lines, watch bits over and over again and giggle ourselves silly until SIL conked out. (She's infamous for not making it through a film.) All I can say is, thank goodness the ILs are NOT here. Though we decided that FIL would be eminently more enjoyable if his grumpiness were to manifest in the way that the bartender's does. ("F---!! A--!!!")

Oh yes. The PSA. If you're going to lure someone off for a quickie and have chosen to adorn yourself with an ass tiara (excellent CS at that biz, BTW,) DO make sure that your partner gets the string all the way out of the way so he doesn't end up with a terrible chafe wound. *cringe* Here ends the first lesson.

Bouncy Pouncy Fun Fun Fun Fun FUN!

Tonight we headed over to Bob's to have supper, hang out, and escape confinement with FIL. Bob's girlies were there, and we brought 2 of the cousins with us for a nice total of 7 girls and, yes, the one boy. The kids splashed in the pool and played, we ate pizza, played the piano and sang. What a blast! We had a rousing rendition of "Jesus Loves Them Prostitutes," some stuff from a couple of Hal Leonard books that GuTTer MuNKi bought (compilations of various old rock songs) and plenty of make-it-up-as-you-go stuff, LOL! Bob demoed a couple of the songs he's mixing for the new CD for us, and WOW! Shame is going to be awesome, and Trudy is one you just can't not sing along with.

Tomorrow morning MIL and FIL take off for greener pastures, leaving us irresponsible children and grandchildren to hold down the fort. Huzzah! A little break from the stress will be nice. Though I feel bad for MIL. We'll get to see her when they get back, as we are looking at extending the trip just a bit so we can see her more and also see our other niece. I'm hoping we'll get a chance to get her out and about with us when they return.

A bonus of this is that we'll get to be extras in our friend Frank's film if all goes well. Yay!

GuTTer MuNKi and FIL fixed one of our van doors so that we can open it from the inside now. His next mission is to replace the broken off door handle of the other door and also fix it so it opens from the inside.

The MuNKi* also surprised me with 2 awesome piano books.

*ME: Naked frivolity. . .
MUNKI: What?
ME: The name of one of the pictures I'm trying to look at
MUNKI: Are you GuTTer MuNKiing again?

Uncomfortability

- I keep just *barely* staving off a full-blown bladder infection.

- FIL is an extremely grumpy person, so we're trying to stay out of the house as much as possible (which, of course, has been resulting in MIL not getting to see the kids enough) but we have to be here sometimes (like for sleeping.) Noise is not good, Patrick. Noise is not good. We are not a quiet herd.

- I decided to go for the Hat Trick by luring GuTTer MuNKi out onto the deck for a quickie last night (or maybe he lured me - I think it was pretty mutual - ever tried to get some time alone in a house with 3 other adults and 6 night-owl kids?) I'm sure one of the neighbours somewhere somehow will be reporting on that to MIL. Actually, I don't think that would complete the hat trick, because at this point I'm beyond caring what anyone else thinks. But I'm sure I'll come up with something. Suggestions, anyone?

Howdy From WI

We're on a whirlwind trip to WI. I realised last Wednesday that my sister's birthday was going to be on Saturday. And it was the big four-oh. So rapid arrangements were made, and Friday afternoon we drove out here to WI to surprise her. My mom was going to pick my sis up and take her to lunch, so we told my mom that we'd pick her up instead. Was she ever surprised, LOL! That was fun. :-) We went to an Indian buffet. Mmmmmm! Currygasm.

So here we are, doing the WI thing for a week or so. Last night, my sis's boyfriend threw a big barbecue for her at his house. He grilled yummy kabobs with Ellie's delicious marinade (squeeze 6 limes, add a can of coconut milk, keep adding garlic paste and ginger paste until the marinade itself is a paste, and spread it on the meat.) There was a lovely fire (I know, Egan, I know) in the fire - um - holder thinggy for roasting marshies, etc. Both Navan and a portion of The Getaway Drivers were there, so we sat around the fire singing and listening to all the musicians make great music. Excellent private concert. :-) Ellie is a luthier, so the fuel was partly fueled by guitar and mandolin bits - mostly leftovers, outside cutout pieces, etc.

GuTTer MuNKi started things off with a lovely political discussion, so I pretty much hid in the corner of the yard until that was over with. It took a long time. A long, long time. Obviously I need to enforce some kind of "no politics" rule with him. I can't take him anywhere. Although truth be told, he and Ellie had a lot of fun with the debate. I, on the other hand, am a very non-confrontational person. You may have whatever beliefs you like, I will have mine, and we'll all be happy. Or at least I will. If you are a miserable sort of person, that's your problem, not mine. Arguing about the rightness and wrongness of our conflicting beliefs makes absolutely no difference to the spinning of the world, so who cares? OTOH, I do find it interesting to have a political discussion now and then when everyone has had at least 2 glasses of wine and is feeling mellow, and is capable of discussing things without caring whether or not everyone's beliefs are perfectly in synch.

Today SIL and I took our Mongol Horde to a petting farm where I was thoroughly sampled by baby goats (bangles, hair, necklace, sandals, ankle bracelet, shirt) but mostly hung out with the kittens. They were excuciatingly cute, and GuTTer MuNKi actually believed me for a couple of very horrified moments when I told him that I'd brought back a new kitten. I was seriously tempted to bring one back for the in-laws, whose "cat" is one of the most evil creatures I've ever had the misfortune to meet. I don't know what it really is. It has the shoulders of an ox, the body of a pig, the legs and tail of a stick drawing, and the temperament of an extremely pissed off electric eel.

We hit one of our favourite used bookstores yesterday and scored a bunch of good stuff, including one of the Outlander books. We'll be hitting the very best one - Frugal Muse -sometime before we go home. I brought a big bin of books to trade in with the dual intention of offsetting the cost a bit and making some shelf space for new books. But I'm really eyeballing some of IKEA's bookshelves.

Speaking of IKEA, I finally saw Fight Club thanks to SIL. What a very strange film. Interesting, if a bit slow paced in places, but strange. The lack of continuity at the end with the whole massive head wound thing kind of yanked me out of the story. We started watching Boondock Saints again with SIL last night, but SIL and I were both losing the battle with the Sandman, due to our late night antics of the preceeding twenty-some hours. Every time I see that film, I appreciate it even more. It's on my Top 5 List. Maybe Top 3. Check it out. :-)

Gorgeous Weather = No Blogging

We are in the blissful days of early Autumn here. Leaves are beginning to turn; birds are flocking up; the air is gorgeous during the day, crisp and cool at night. Delicious.

It's not that I've been outside more than usual, really. But the time I spend indoors has been spent in slightly more creative ways than blogging, I guess. And at night, I just want to read or play the piano. I'm also avoiding cropping pics and uploading them. Silly, but there you are. I have some neat ones, I think, and I'll try to get them up soon.

On The Boy's birthday we went to Kensington to picnic. We had our favourite spot all to ourselves and discovered a new little beachy thing we hadn't found before. The kids swam and GuTTer MuNKi and I enjoyed ourselves on the bank and wading in the shallows. I should have taken the camera, but didn't.

Today I went out to the butterfly garden to take pics of a pretty Tiger Swallowtail and ended up seeing a hummingbird, too. He was sampling all the various flowers. I got a few pics of him, but he was hard to catch on film - or pixels, I guess. I'll post the best along with the other stuff. Eventually.

I had the great misfortune to step on a cat brush today. It stuck in my heel by 2 of the nail thinggies and hung there until I pulled it out. Ish and blah. I had to do something else before I could attend to my wounds, and when I looked down, there was a lovely puddle of blood on the floor. And then I left a nice gory trail while hopping for the First Aid box. :-P No pics of that either.

Today was the first day in what seems like a long time that I haven't gotten a headache. I'm not usually a headache person, but they started after I got smashed in TKD a few weeks ago. Actually, GuTTer MuNKi got thrown on my head. (short but boring story) I thought it was because my glasses were so out of whack, but getting them straightened didn't help. Then I realised, duh, head trauma. I guess it's pretty common to have headaches for several weeks after something like that, but I'm glad they seem to be done. I hope I didn't lose any important brain cells.

We went to a party at the house of another TKD family on Saturday and now I desire to have a firepit. They had a bonfire and it was lovely. All the boys and men were drawn to it like flies. I don't think a single one of them got out of there without adding more wood to the fire. We chucked the football around a lot (and me in a dress, LOL!) and talked and ate and toasted things in the fire and just generally had a good time.

With Fate's perfect timing, we got a cool postcard from Peter from Athens today. Perfect timing because our history leson had mentioned Athens. The kids were very impressed. :-) Thanks, Pete! :-) OPA!! LOL!

My book is calling me. Oh, if you like Jane Austen, I HIGHLY recommend The Jane Austen Book Club by Karen Joy Fowler. Such a funny book, with such an Austenish ending. :-) And a fast read, too. But now it's back to Outlander, which (like many books before it) has deposed Covenant, muahahahaha!!

It's About Thyme HNT

Yes, once again you must wade through all the pics to get to the HNT at end. Or at least scroll past them . . .


I was thrilled to discover this little guy growing on my deck. I forget when I planted the seeds - months ago, at any rate, and no thanks to my total neglect, this little fellow grew anyway. The other containers on the deck contain plants from a new sort of gardening called "naturoculture." (Yes, OK, I just made that up.) They're mostly filled with millet and sunflowers planted by the birds and Hoover, the chipmunk.

Here's something else that grew anyway. Can you spot the imposter?


Yes, it's - well, some sort of squash!



In lieu of flowery prose, I'll just serve up the flowers, along with a side of interesting insects.







I had to get into a really weird and uncomfortable yoga-esque postition for this one, so I hope you enjoy it:



GuTTer MuNKi got this one of a hummingbird moth at our butterfly bush.



And I found Jewel Weed growing at the edge of our deck.



Here's the thing about Jewel Weed. It's a great antidote to Poisons Ivy, Oak and Sumac. HOWEVER, it tends to grow where you find poison ivy. I'm a little leery about what else I'm going to find growing under or around the deck. :-/

Another honeybee:


And a wonderful drink mix made from the fruits of his bretheren's labour:



GuTTer MuNKi* told me he'd take me to Ren Faire if I had something appropriate to wear, so I bought a bolt of Muslin (with my 40% off JoAnn's coupon of course)



And bought a pattern for a chemise. (not what you expected, was it?) Eventually I hope to end up with something like this. I had already forgotten how much Trillian likes to help with the cutting stage.


My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

I tried explaining to her that Inigo himself is not the six-fingered man, but she wasn't having any of that.

Yes, I sewed up the chemise. No, I haven't sewn up the brocade shirt yet. It's a UFO (sewingese for "UnFinished Object.") Yes, I'll get to it eventually. :-P


OK, lastly but not leastly before HNT, it's always a little shocking to me that something like this:



Can turn into something like this:



This one's a little dirty. Well, the bottoms of my feet are, anyway. After 2 weeks without an HNT, I guess you could say it's about thyme.




*OK, how weird is it that of the very few hits I got when I Googled "falling soup" hoping to find a funny pic for this link, one was Inigo Montoya, and one was The Killers, whose new album I am looking forward to with bated breath? "Odd," said Mabel. "Very odd."

Wednesday Eve Again

Hooray for Wednesday Eve! I'm reading too many books (OK there is no such thing as too many books) and not writing or blogging. Sort of a post-submission party sort of thing, I guess, but I need to get back to the writing tomorrow. Or tonight.

Anyway, long story short, here are some random things going on of late in no specific order. Perhaps some will spark commentable memories of your own:

- 2 Bee stings, 2 different children within about 10 mins 1 outside, 1 indoors

- apparent demise of hydrangea bush

- purchase of hibiscus bush and "snow fairy"(crappy pic) on sale, WOO HOO!

- apparent resurrection of hydrangea bush after moving to shadier spot

- viewing (and great enjoyment) of Nanny McPhee (Firthaliciousness!)

- flying sidekick practice and jump snap-kick practice (WHEEEEEEEeeeee!!)

- attendace of 2 library summer reading program parties

- procurement of free book (The Jane Austen Book Club - extremely witty and enjoyable so far)

- viewing of Failure to Launch (had its moments, but not stellar by any means)

- reading of The Penultimate Peril (FINALLY!! Good stuff. "I suppose I'll have to add the force of gravity to my list of enemies." )

- More reading of Outlander. Yum!

- Teaching of TKD and BREAKTHROUGH moment of getting 3 year old boy with attention span of gnat to double punch. WOO HOO!! I'm sure I'll have to begin at the beginning again on Thursday. :-P

- discovery of Vouvray

- extreme enjoyment of chicken parmesan (grated parmesan, bread crumbs, olive oil and garlic patted onto salted-and-peppered chicken breasts) and scrapbooking with friend

- alcohol units: some, unmentionable liaison units: extreme, blogging time units: limited

I guess that's pretty much up to date then. I'll attempt a real post when I can get my face out of some of these books.

More Random Musings

Mostly piccys today. Not a lot to say. Still reading.



I was happily snapping away at the flowers today, when The Boy spotted a toad. Oh Joy!



They like to have those ridges behind their eyes stroked. This one leaned into the petting most happily.



Shortly thereafter, I heard much coversation being carried on with "Commander Toad." The honourable Commander was apparently unfazed by his craft's lack of wings, though I suspect that the many, many ensuing crash scenarios may have been aided thereby. (Don't worry, The Boy didn't actually crash the plane with The Commander on board. It was all strictly simulation.)





Alien lifeforms were discovered. Chiefly, some sort of chamaeleon-toed feline.




Back on the home planet, a Japanese beetle waged destruction on Commander Toad's favourite rhododendron bush.



And a large sunflower turned its face to the sun. It was later decapitated by an unknown foe. (Most likely a squirrel. The mangled remains of said flower were found on the other side of the neighbour's fence.)



**************

Random Observations:

How to keep track of whose clothes are whose:



#1 child gets 1 dot, add a dot when you pass on to #2, etc. etc.

Time to get another copy of my favourite piece of music:



One of my favourite bits - sounds tricky, isn't, and is really fun to play.



The original inventor of the HWT Plankton and his creation:



And yet another lily. Sick of lilies yet? But I don't think I've posted the same colour twice. :-)

The Moral of This Story is. . .

When we came home the other day, I was driving up to the mailbox with the window down in order to grab the mail, when what should I see but a salesman on the doorstep. YIKES! Thinking on my feet (well, on my bum since I was driving) I quickly pulled forward to the next mailbox (uh yes, maybe I was putting in flyers or, ah, looking at house numbers) and then over to the proper side of the street (for this country) and, happily realising that it didn't really matter what the sales guy thought, on to the next road, where I turned casually right. We circled for a while, drove around the subdivision, then headed back home. Instructing the kids to keep their eyes peeled, I drove slowly toward the house. Aha! There he was, 2 houses down, spraying something on the hapless - a word which here means "unlucky enough to get caught outside, or witless enough to answer the door" - neighbour's rain gutter. Whew! Dodged THAT bullet. But just in case he'd seen us returning, I told the kids not to go near the door if the bell rang. I just did NOT feel like dealing with it. Fortunately, the kids eat this sort of stealth stuff up. We skulked around and had a generally good time. I felt like Jamie Lee Curtis (hee hee - who can forget that scene in True Lies??) in Christmas With the Kranks when the carolers are singing outside and they're sneaking through the house. ("This is fun!" *giggle*)

So what's the point of all this? Well, as Lemony Snicket writes:

The moral of "The Three Bears," for instance, is "Never break into someone else's house." The moral of "Snow White" is "Never eat apples." The Moral of World War One is "Never assassinate Archduke Ferdinand."

I guess that the moral of this story, if indeed it has one, is "Even a discommodious - a word which here means "having a nosy salesman pressing his nose against your windows so that you're forced to crawl around on your hands and knees like a prisoner in your own house" - situation can be turned into something fun." Actually, that's probably the moral of my life. :-) Not that my life can be described as discommodious. . .

*******

Here's what I'm watching:

Le Placard

I love where he's listening to the depressing news headlines rolling on and his toast jumps out the window, LOL!

Told you that little library's DVD section rocks.

Here's what I want to see (among other things):

This film. And this one. No, I don't have a thing for Dustin Hoffman. Honest.

Oh, yeah, and after Googling for that piccy of Jamie Lee Curtis, This One. I do have a thing for Pierce Brosnan.

I have pictures lurking in the other computer. One or two may involve cats. I'm too lazy to go crop and upload. Plus, GuTTer MuNKi's using that one right now. And I really want to get back to Outlander. Count your blessings.

Eschew Obfusification

The Outlander book came in at the library yesterday. That was fast!! I've already gotten sucked in. Poor Thos Covenant takes the backseat once again.

I'm also reading a book called "First you Shave Your Head." What with my having been sucked in by 2 books, there may be a little less blogitivity than normal. We shall see.

My Flylady thing is going in fits and starts. I remember some things and forget others, so I'm kind of stumbling along, but the general trend is definitely one of improvement.

The James Bond set caught on fire the other day. Fortunately they're already in post-production, so I won't have to go into premature withdrawal. They ought to auction off pieces of movie sets. Can you imagine how much collectors would have paid for various bits and pieces of Star Wars sets?

Speaking of films, our tiny little library (the one we don't have to pay to use) has a fabulous DVD section -- much bigger (especially DVD : books ratio-wise) than our bigger library's. Thanks to this, GuTTer MuNKi and I watched "Closer" last night, which we thoroughly enjoyed. Very well-acted, and I really liked the script. Even though it wasn't the sort of ending I typically go for, I'd definitely watch it again. I've only seen Jude Law in a couple of things, so maybe he's a regular chamaeleon and I just don't know it. Anyway, in this one, I'd describe him as a mixture of Sting and John-Boy Walton. If you don't believe me, watch the film, LOL! For the girls, there's also Clive Owen, and for the boys, Julia Roberts and a nearly naked Natalie Portman. We did have to watch with subtitles for a bit, as there's a little bit of LOTR syndrome with the sound in this film.

What? I haven't ranted on about LOTR syndrome? Here's a brief synopsis:

**whisper, whisper, mumble, mumble** (you turn up the sound)
**whisper, whisper, whisp -- RAGE, ROAR, RIP, SHRED, EXPLOSION!!** (Holy --!! Heart attack!! Sound down!!)
**whisper, whisper, whisper, mumble** (sound up)
**whi-- AAAAAARRRGGHH, RAAAAAHK, SHRIEK!!!!**

In short, these are films that are not something you can watch while the children are awake, but are nearly impossible to watch after they've gone to bed as well.

"Closer" has its share of mumbled whispering followed by loudly shrieked obscenities. Where was I going with this? Oh yes. I was trying to make out a bit of conversation between Mr. Owen and Miss Portman that was particularly confusing, even with subtitles. GuTTer MuNKi was unable to help me decipher the meaning even after several replays. Turns out he wasn't actually reading the subtitles any of those times. But I did find out that the words get in the way of Natalie's bare bum. (rolleyes) Now you know. What you do with this information is up to you.

My mission today is to submit my latest short story to BUST mag for their One-Handed Read.