Saturday, December 30, 2006

There's WHAT at the End of the Rainbow?!

Here it is, the Holy Grail of anti-nausea medicines:



Whal Myung Su Gold, it's called. Liquid gold, as I understand it. We felt good enough to venture in to Ann Arbor today, our target being neighbouring Korean and Indian grocery stores. Mmmm. Both smelled heavenly, but I suspect that we are some of their very few crossover customers. We were fortunate enough to find the magical medicine at the Korean grocery, and promptly bought 6 bottles.

My friend assures me that this stuff is liquid magic, but I'm hoping not to need to test that theory for quite some time as (knock on wood) I'm doing a lot better today. One thing we have learned, my friend and I, is that if you intend to take any sort of Asian medicine, it's best not to read the label. We both faced a bit of a dilemma when we read the label of the pictured product, and learned that one of the ingredients is "myristicae semen." (are you laughing at us now, Jaichan?)

Naturally, the first question that leaps to mind is "what the hell are myristicae?" The second question is, "am I ballsy enough to drink this?" ;) And the third is, "if it makes me feel better, do I even care what's in it?" Yes, in the end it all boils down to that age-old hot tub dilemma. (a dilemma which, incidentally, I have never personally faced.)


Of course, discussion of this amongst the moms at TKD made for plenty of banter about what would happen if our husbands found out about this mystical ingredient, and the inevitable "Stomach flu? Well, Honey, you know what to do; it cures nausea. . ." jokes (surprisingly uttered by someone other than myself.)

I think the semen is made easier to ignore by the fact that the product is in a professionally packaged little glass bottle, but my friend and I are the morbidly curious type, so she asked her (Korean) husband to look into it for us. He assured us that it is a mistranslation of something meaning "the root or beginning of life" - maybe something like a "rhizome," of which there are quite a few different kinds in this stuff, and until today I was happy to believe that (and afraid to discover otherwise.) But for you, Dear Reader, I have faced my fears and Googled said myristicae semen and -- with no little trepidation, I assure you -- clicked on the first hit. Who knew? ^_^

26 comments:

Spider Girl said...

Heh, you're a brave person to try it and if it works why not--but I'm glad for your sake it's nutmeg just the same.

ldbug said...

I wonder if nutmeg helps the nausea or just improves the taste?

Candace said...

Spidey - LOL! I'm glad, too.

Snow - I guess the mace part helps with nausea because it's listed as having anti-nausea and anti-diarrheal properties. Too cool! I'm laughing at myself because for a brief moment when I first read your comment I thought you meant "improves the taste when you puke." ^_^

Mr. Fabulous said...

What? Has crystal meth fallen COMPLETELY out of fashion?

kitkat said...

So, it's for when you're nauseous or when the voices in your head are telling you you're nauseous? Heh. Very versatile. Ginger's good for upset stomach too.

Trundling Grunt said...

Wow, I want to see the Youtube video of GM trying it. It must be good given the dubious nature of the ingredients and the flashy packaging. Maybe it would be better if you didn't know the real translation as it could be that the word "semen" is correct and the other word is wrong?

Candace said...

Mr. Fab - uh, you leave me speechless. ^_^

Kitkat - Or when both you AND the voices in your head are nauseous. Ginger is one of the few things I have been able to eat. Pickled, with rice, oddly enough, but ginger nonetheless. I tried to get more today, but all they had was the Japanese kind with Aspartame. (The Japanese seem to be overly fond of artificial sweetners.)

TG - Well, I haven't got GM to try it yet, but 2 of the kids are drinking it with good results. You're absolutely right about the translation. I'm definitley not digging any further. ^_^

Bugs said...

Wow ! Who knew nutmeg had balls ?!
" Mace-The ballsy John Wayne of the herb world.Guaranteed to blow your mind...and stomach...and toothache...and..."

snavy said...

ya know ... my husband has been trying to tell me for about 16 years that ingesting semen is all kinds of good for me.

personally, i think he's a moron

nutmeg ... now there's a spice

The Grunt said...

I think a field trip to this bottling company is in order.

somewhere joe said...

Candace - as a Michigander, you have access to Vernors ginger ale - good for what ails you and famously tummy-friendly. (Guaranteed semen-free.)

Candace said...

Bugs - looks like I need to make a run to Penzey's Spices and stock up!

Snavvy - ^_^ I duuno, it has its charms. Maybe I should feed MuNKi some mace and nutmeg for an added bonus. . .


Grunt - Now there's an idea! We could call it Health class! And Social Studies. And language study. And shopping for tix, cheapest hotels, etc. would be math. Hmmmm, we could do a whole semester around this. . .

Somewhere Joe - I forgot all about ginger ale. I used to drink it when I had morning sickness. Is Vernor's from here?

I've been wondering for a while now, does being female make me a Michigoose?

somewhere joe said...

I stand corrected. I've certainly never heard of a mongander.

Candace said...

Or mongoslings! Good point. How long does one need to liver here to become a Michigander? Or am I one already by virtue of having taken up residency?

What's a Vermont person called? A Vermonter? It's not Vermontonian. How about Connecticut? There are a few I can never figure out. I believe Indianonians are simply Hoosiers.

somewhere joe said...

I'm sure you're a Michigander by now. We'll use the masculine form, since all Michiganders are created equal. Besides if I remember correctly, a genuine Michigoose requires the donning of mittens.

We were wondering what someone who evoked the goddess Venus would be called. Venusesque? Awkward. Venusian? Not very graceful-sounding. Venerial? Um, no...

Candace said...

Ah, well certainly no mittens are in use at this time! It's raining mongeese and octopi.

Venerial! ^_^ That's a really good question, actually. Hmmm. Wikipedia says that Venus has been compared to Tlahuizcalpantecuhtli from Aztec mythology, so maybe Tlahuizcalpantecuhtlian?

Bah! I think I sprained my tongue.

somewhere joe said...

Tlahuizcalpantecuhtlian?

I think I'm dyslexic now - thank you.

Gawpo said...

I've eaten lots of sperm. Pounds and pounds of it. My whole family used to have sperm for dinner. My mom, hands DOWN is the best sperm cook I know. You just roll it in flour (dusted with salt and pepper), then a quick egg wash, and then finish with bread crumbs with tons of romano (not parmesan!). The cheese is the secret to making it brown in the frying pan. Shad milts. We ate the sperm sacks of the shad we'd catch in a net in the San Joaquin Delta near Galt. And yes, we all swallowed.

Candace said...

Joe - that's pretty much how I felt all through Anthropology class. (the parts I didn't sleep through, anyway)

Gawpo - you are, hands down, the weirdest guy I know. Congratulations! This is why I love you so much. ^_^

Just Tom said...

Candace, Gawpo has been my bud for nearly a decade, and I must concur. with all of it.

You do know that if you weren't so nice and perfect in every way I would hate your guts...you are super mom, super awesome sexy wife, amazing person at all you do...if I didn't have such a bitchin' hubby, I'd switch teams and fall in love with you.

Happy New Year to you and your lovely fam!

Cindra said...

Uh, that was really from me...Cindra....signed in on Tom's computer at the coast...but I'm sure that he's just as in love with you!

Winters said...

I suspect it is such stout remedies that have made the "TKD moms" the imposing body they are today.

I for one am petrified of them...

Candace said...

LOL! I hate when I post as GuTTer MuNKi. :-P Oh, trust me, I have a ton of faults. I just conveniently fail to blog most of them. ^_^

Candace said...

Winters - have no fear! I'm no cannibal. For the most part. It depends on how you define "eat."

Gawpo said...

As Goofy would say with fingertip to front teeth and sweeping foot, "Ah shucks, a-hyuck, a-hyuck." Cindra knows that I love sperm. Don't let her play dumb. Not here of all places.

Candace said...

Gawpo - how much sperm would a sperm whale whale if a sperm whale could whale sperm?

Cindra is a woman of many mysteries. And strange friends. ^_^