Sunday, January 07, 2007

BILLY is Mine!

We went to IKEA today to buy BILLY. Our plan is to start with one and add on, mainly because we can only strap 110 lbs to the roof of our van, and BILLY weighs 98. We also planned to find a bin or 2 to go on BILLY's bottom shelf. Of course, what you plan to get at IKEA and what you actually buy are often 2 different things, but we did pretty well.

Wandering around upstairs we were delighted to no end by products like
EKTORP, MAGIKER, PLUTT, and LACK (which seems to be missing something I can't put my finger on.)

We were fascinated, too, to find out the origins of some of the names.
POÄNG, for instance, is an onomatopoeic word representing the sound that the chair makes when you lean it back too far and it springs up, launching you across the room. This actually happened while we were there, and we were thrilled to witness the birth of a new product, PLOOMPF, which, as it turns out, is excellent for cushioning a rapidly broken fall. Look for it soon in an IKEA near you.

Being a container-loving geek, I was quite taken with
MUCK. MUCK can be used in BILLY to hold KRAPP. (We already have plenty of KRAPP.) I was also very tempted by GORM. Not the least because if I buy one, no one can rightly accuse me of being GORMless. But when it came to GROGGY, I figured I didn't need any more of that. Especially now that I've got the cold everyone else had.

We chose not to eat at the cafeteria. I've heard the meatballs can make you
FARTYG.

Downstairs, I tried to steer the kids right past the
AINA near the ORGEL section and around the large pile of ASPUDDEN someone had left on the floor. I was making haste for a more family-friendly section, but the little MuNKis were pretty ALERT and I wasn't able to get them out of there before they had asked some pretty awkward questions about the GLÄNSA, which were, to my dismay, prominently displayed at child's-eye level. I think a complaint is in order. (Though it will no doubt go straight into their DOKUMENT holder.)

After a lot of wandering around, we developed some
FLÄRKing nasty KRAMFORS in our legs. And on top of it all, I found myself in the middle of what seemed to be an Abbott and Costello routine trying to explain that yes, I did want NOT. No, realli. We headed straight for checkout after MuNKi took the name BUMERANG to heart and turned FRAGIL into two new lines: SPLINTR and SHÅRD.

When we finally left, we had a
HELLUM a time getting BILLY home. At one point on the freeway, we heard something clunk against the car and feared the worst. WET was coming from the sky and when we stopped at a light, MuNKi found that BILLY's box (apparently made from recycled toilet paper) had disintegrated and blown open on on the stem end. We pulled into the nearest parking lot to see what we could do. Fortunately, I had impulsively bought BAG for 99 cents at the checkout to use as our new swimming carryall and I had the presence of mind to slip it over the end of BILLY's box and BILLY made it home with no damaged or missing parts. Hooray for impulse buys say I.

I can't wait to put BILLY together tomorrow. I'm sure he'll be
PERFEKT.

18 comments:

polyergos said...

I went to IKEA today too! In Toronto though. Still, it's Swedish for common cents. And I gave them all my American pennies.

What are you doing up so late? It's a school night! :)

cindra said...

Okay, now that was very, very clever. I'm really impressed...you are too much! now come over to the word game and do your thing with my words, darling.

tshsmom said...

That's a great price for Billy! I couldn't make one for that price.

OK, Glansa is just FREAKY...crown of thorns anyone?

VERY creative post!

Lady Bonds said...

Hmm...I keep thinking of more books to add to the others...I'd say The Incredible Journey--they made a silly movie out of it a few years ago, but the book is far superior, no anthropomorphization, all animals are happy, healthy, and together at the end.

Is Mollusc the oldest? What are the others reading?

Oh, My Side of the Mountain, too. (I can't remember the reading level for that one, though...it might be too young...)

And yes, IKEA IS taking over the world.

Candace said...

P - that's weird! Did you see my friend BILLY?

I always try to give away my Canadian pennies. Maybe we should trade. ;)

I should have gone to bed earlier. Today I pay. :-P

Cindra - OMG - Word Game! OK, I'll do my best to get over there after class this morning. :)


TShsmom - is'nt that a great price? I know - the wood alone would cost more than that! ANd their stuff is really easy to assemble. I love IKEA!

Isn't that a weird product? I have to wonder what inspired some of their stuff.

Lady Bonds - Oh, great suggestion! I bet she'd love that!

Yep, Mollusc is the oldest. Oh, she loved the My Side of the Mountain books.

The others are 9, 7, and 5. I'll try to put up a list of what they like when we get home today. :)

Logophile said...

LOL, you are a linky queeen today! I love it. I also love IKEA, and I adore my enormous IKEA bag, ADORE it I say!
It is a fabulous purchase, you have chosen wisely.

ARM said...

That's positevely awesome. You are very clever.

BILLY Seems pretty cool,though. I need a BILLY at home as well as my library keeps increasing.

Candace said...

Logo - Great to hear it! I think I can put The Prawn in it if need be. ^_^

Arm - Thank you. You can't go to IKEA and not have fun with those names. I challenge anyone to try. Can't be done. ^_^ Yeah, my books have a way of multiplying when I'm not looking.

Egan said...

I also went to Ikea yesterday. I'm sorry I didn't see you there, but relieved Billy has a proper home.

We bought some linens and a new dishdrying rack to replace our very used one.

Candace said...

Aw, I'm so bummed we missed you. Billy is anxiously awaiting his assemblage. I need to go clonk MuNKi on the melon and motivate him somehow.

APA is fun. Turns out all the white surfaces on this storage box work as dry-erase board. WOO HOO!

Bugs said...

I'm too scared to go to Ikea as I'm always hit with an overwhelming urge to buy buy buy everything...oh and those loft-style double beds *sigh*
Love the word-smithing !

somewhere joe said...

I wish we had an Ikea. I feel underaccessorized and culturally gesharded.

Candace said...

Bugs - It's a dangerous place! :) Oh, those loft doubles are COOL!

Joe - It might be safer not to have one. ^_^

Winters said...

Tremendous linky brand-namey post, C.

I once bought a self-assembly cupboard. Once I got the thing home, I took the constituent parts of the cupboard out of the box, laid them on the floor, and waited for this mystical self-assembly to take place.

I was sadly disappointed...

Candace said...

LOL! That's exactly what I envisioned when I read your first "self-assembly." ^_^ Maybe you just got a defective one. (You said something about "detective" and they heard "defective"??)

My word verif has finally changed to "lupon" which is apparently for 50% off a wolf. . .

Gawpo said...

We don't have an IKEA over here, so that's probably why I couldn't understand all those strange words. I like the word, Billy, but we just use the word Bookshelf for that one. And Ektorp, well that's what we call a sofa. Weird, huh?

Gawpo said...

Hey, that reminds me----one time (but not at band camp) we had our cousins the Saladinos over from New York and Esther kept calling Saul an Ektorp Potato. He was looking for the remote and she told him that she put it away on the Billy. Now I get it.

Candace said...

^_^ If it had been band camp, the remote would have ended up in something quite different form a BILLY. ^_^

Ektorp sounds like a backwards word, but so does Protke. . .