Sunday, June 18, 2006

Candice

^ It's clickable.



I would have posted sooner but was enduring a battery of rather startling and inconvenient events, which, I believe have been recorded by a certain author. I was ravished by Bulgurs, wounded in the thigh and disembowled, upon which I died. Later, it turned out that I hadn't actually died and I escaped, only to be (uncharacteristically) hung at an auto-da-fe. Fortunately, the surgeon who bought my corpse for medical study realised I was still alive when his critical incision drew a yell from my not-dead lips. He placed me in the care of a Jesuit priest, who ravished me again and sold me to an Israelite, who ravished me and sold me to a Dutch pirate, who ravished me and lost me when his ship sank. Fortunately, I grabbed a giant red sheep that was swimming past and was carried to the relative safety of the shore, where I was captured by a Sultan and placed in his harem. When the Russian army appeared and tried to starve out the Sultan's guards, the guards cut off the left buttocks of all of us harem girls to eat. Shortly thereafter, reinforcement Russians destroyed our fortress. I won't bore you with the rest of the details, but suffice it to say that I had sufficient reason to be tardy in my posting.

How ironic is it that my copy of Candide is a translation by John Butt? :-)

OK, so first off, I want to say Happy Father's Day to all the dads out there. I hope you have a great day! :-)

Sluggie's tooth looks as good as new. The dentist built it up with white composite stuff. Who knew that a dentist also had to be a sculptor? I learn something new every day.

Gordy tested for senior brown belt yesterday. He did great and also sat quietly while he waited his turn to answer Qs. (That's pretty hard for 6-year-old boys.)





He got everything right except for "What is the at school routine?" That one's only on the wall, not in the book, and we really need to copy it down.



As it was, he replied that he doesn't go to school (of which the Master is well aware, LOL!) and that "all I have to do is my math" LOL! He did answer "Do you obey the bus driver's instructions?" with "Yes, and that's my parents." :-)


He knew some of the vocab that's not in the book, too. Here he is breaking his board with an axe kick.




During the test, The Prawn busied herself by becoming a meringue. (There's an a/c vent there.)


The raccoons are increasing in a seemingly exponential fashion. Last night there were babies galore. Tiny babies came first. The rice wasn't their first choice, so I went out and moved it off the top of the bowl so they could get to the good stuff. They were really brave and stayed there while I did so. Of course the kids had to get out there, too. The one in the bowl kept looking sideways at Mollusc while he ate, LOL!



You can tell what a baby this one is by the loooooong-looking legs. His bod isn't fat enough yet to conceal his legs.



I suppose in about 3 more years we'll have HUNDREDS of raccys.


The kids are watching Anastasia, starring
Kate, Jake , Beast, and Dr. Brown. Oh, and Agador Spartacus. Very entertaining. :-)

Yesterday was the last day of the library book sale, which means only one thing: A WHOLE BAG OF BOOKS FOR A BUCK, BABY!!!!! Muahahahahahahaha!!!! :-) Oh yeah. I scored quite a few of Frank Herbert's not-Dune books, several Piers Anthonys, a couple of Terry Brookses and quite a few other goodies. My reading pile grows and grows.

Today I harvested a bunch of these:


Please excuse me if my thoughts flit here and there.



I've probably had too much sugar today.


(chocolate cake mix combined with a stick of butter, pressed into the pan, topped with 1c choc chips, 1 c white chips, 2 c coconut and a can of sweetened condensed milk mixed with another 1/2 c of nuked choc ships, baked at 350 for 18 mins)

Our tadpoles still live. They eat boiled lettuce.



My time spent learning how to repair multi-million dollar warplanes paid off yesterday when I was able to fix the kids' cash register ( the drawer would no longer open.) These are no doubt manufactured by 5-year-old children in China. But hey, I did it!


(note drawer which now opens when the button is pressed)
I left the little hands in the upper pic because those are one of the 2 pairs that kept trying to help me, causing the whole operation to be a lot more difficult than fixing an F-16. :-/


Some might say that with all the time I've taken off from blogging there must be more to write about. And that's true enough, but I must go and work in the garden. ;-)

8 comments:

Logophile said...

This weekend I...
I programmed the VCR and, um,
fed the neighbor's cat.
I'm exhausted!

Trundling Grunt said...

Now I suppose you're going to blame me for at least one of those distractions. Did you enjoy it (not having your buttock removed, but the book)?

Candace said...

Heh, Logo. I know what you mean! :-)

TG - yes, I do blame you. And I thank you, too. I laughed a lot (while reading it - not having my buttock removed.) :-)

Toby said...

All that ravishing reminded me of the Marcy Playground song, "Sex and Candy" but I replaced candy with Candace.

If you fed me I think I would be fat. I think I could eat that entire cake in one sitting.

Egan said...

Are you feeding the raccoons? You're harvesting your lavender meanwhile I'm removing ours.

jackt said...

1) Making the post title clickable makes it IMPOSSIBLE to go directly to the post from an RSS Reader!!! GRRR!!!

2) I am glad you have found a new vocation as a bus driver. At least the kids listen to what you say.

3) Those raccoons- if you leave food out, they will continue to come over. One day you won't want them there when they weight 50 pounds and attack your actual pets as a coordinated pack. Mark my words! :)

Candace said...

Toby - heh! IRL I'm "Candy" so it works either way. :-) I have a thing about baking. Baking is great because the end results are sweets. I love sweets! Is the way to your heart through your stomach? :-)

Egan - yes we give them leftovers that we can't compost (or that they need, LOL!) Shhhh. Don't tell anyone. ;-) I know - it drives me crazy that you're ripping out lavendar, LOL!

Jack - d'oh!! Sorry! I'll try to bear that in mind.

Maybe I can convince the raccoons that they, too, are pets. . . :-)

Egan said...

Feeding raccoons eh? Are you going to leave food out for the crows and rats too?