Saturday, June 03, 2006

Well Smack My Grandma!!

Mr. Froggy

OK this has nothing to do with grandmas, at least not at this stage of the writing. Maybe something will work its way in there. I just used it for a title because the DJ at the "family fun" thing last night said it and it made me laugh. Now you, too, can use this eloquent expression.

Today The Prawn and my friend's daughter were both invited to a birthday party, so we went together to save gas/not lose me because I suck at simultaneous driving and navigation. From The Prawn's reaction to this, riding in their van was every bit as exciting as actually going to the party, LOL! It turned out to be very, very cool because the b-day family had a sailboat. The dad (also a friend from TKD) offered to take me out, and after sort of declining twice, I gave in, LOL! He was dying to get it out on the water for the first time this year and I was itching to get out, too, as it's been about 9 years since I last sailed. Boy, do I have the bug again now. It was coming on anyway, but now my fate is sealed - sailing fever bigtime. It was awesome! They live right on a private lake and there are no motorboats or jetskis allowed. The wind was great - enough to really go, but not get flung about wildly. Oh, yeah, the kids had a good time, too, LOL! It ended up being sort of a beach party as all the kids wandered down to their little beach and built The Panama Canal and frolicked and, yes, swam - fully clothed, LOL!

We gave the little girl a purple dress-up cloak I had made some time ago for the online store (which I basically ignore these days as I can no longer get into my FTP program for some reason :-P Plus, who has the time?!?)

The little girl is Prawnie's size, so it's down to almost her ankles and should last a good long time. :-) I'm always a bit nervous about giving homemade gifts. People who sew realise there's love and effort put into them, but I'm never sure how they'll be received by those who don't sew. To be on the safe side, we gave a set of rubber stamps, too. :-) My fears were probably groundless, as everyone went "Ooooooh!" when she pulled out the cloak. She seemed to really like both gifts. Whew!

GutTEr MuNKi got a really racy catalog in the mail today and my friend and I were looking at it with him before leaving for the party. I'm not linking it because I don't want the kind of peeps who are Googling that ending up here, but if you're dying of curiosity, LMK. It seemed to start out relatively tame, and move onward more and more into the realm of psychotic freakdom, but we didn't get all the way through before we had to leave. On the way back, my friend and I were wondering where it could possibly be going from where we had left off, so of course we had to check it out when we got home. Well smack my Grandma! I know about a fair number of strange and eccentric bedroom practices, but there are things in this catalog that I had never heard of before. And WHY someone would want to voluntarily do these things is well beyond me. It was with much sniggering, gasping, exclaiming and rapid hiding of the magazine every time one of the kids wandered through that we finished the catalog.

So GuTter MuNKi and The Boy were on their own for a bit as they dropped off the bigs at a sleepover this afternoon and The Prawn and I were off at the party. Naturally, they went to The Man Store and purchased oddly shaped lightbulbs, which we needed, and Mr. Froggy up there, whom we didn't but who is pretty neat-o. He's solar, and will help light the walk to the front door, which is otherwise left in inky blackness at night, so I guess maybe we did need him.

Guess what I discovered about the Four Ring (well, it ain't the One Ring - it's my 4th. . . so far) today.

Well smack my grandma! When the hell did that happen? Probably on Thursday evening when I was helping with Little Kid class and showing them how to punch the bag. Crap. This break is in a different place than the last time. I take it off when we work on the bags in our class and when we spar, but it never occurred to me to take it off when I was teaching that night. Poo. The "sold" tramp stamp is sounding more and more appealing. :-P

Since The Bigs were going to be off at a sleepover, GutTer MuNKi also bought chem sticks at The Man Store so the Littles would have something entertaining of their own tonight. It worked.

Oh yeah - when I got home from the party (aka the awesome sailing) it was to find that GuTter MuNKi had been cleaning the bathroom and bedroom and making that awesome Bajingo Chicken of his. Guess who gets a huuuuuuuuuuuge-@$$ reward tonight?? Something to rival the catalog, albeit in a totally non freaky-psychotic way.


jackt said...

I counted "LOL!" four times in paragraph two! You musta really liked sailing! LOL! ;)

What's your online store? Invisibility cloaks? There's a big market for that I would imagine. You know, wizards, thieves, diminutive prison bitches, college perverts (makes panty raids much easier).

Candace said...

Dude, I was so geeked up about it it's not even funny. (or maybe it is) That's actually kind of embarrassing how much I used LOL, but I really do laugh that much IRL. Laugh Junkie - that's me. I actually do it MORE than that (refrains with difficulty from using LOL here - and again here. . .)

Panty raids!!! Was it you who linked to that panty raid story a little while ago? You know that actually went on at my parents'(strict, Christian!!) college. I think there would prolly be some sort of sexual harrassment thing filed over that kind of stuff these days.

I'm totally cracking up over the diminuitive prison bitches. That could be my niche market. And I could charge a lot more.

Seeleah said...



Candace said...

M'goi lay ho doa. :-) Ngo do oi lay! :-)

Jaichan said...

Birthday? Happy Birthday! おめでとうございます! Omedeto gozaimasu!
Ah, glowsticks. Fragments of crazy nights in Japan and Thailand are coming back to me.

Trundling Grunt said...

Happy birthday - hope it brought you everything you hoped for (and from the sounds of the catalogue some things you hadn't even thought of)

Anonymous said...

Oooh a racy catalogue? Well, slap my grandma, and tell me what one it is! oh and then run because she'll chase you down in her wheel chair and beat you down. Fear the 98 Polish German. Fear. Her. Wrath. I do.

It's your birthday? I missed seeing that but then I'm not too observant so...*shrugs* So anyway! happy birthday.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Candace said...

Jai - THANKS! Are you gonna blog about your glowstick escapades?

TG - It was a gorgeous and extremely lovely day!! :-)

JH- You wanna know? I can post the link in the comments on your blog. I don't want those peeps ending up here, LOL!

Thank you all for Bday wishes. It was a wonderful day. :-)

Candace said...

OMG Jenna, you said "Wrath." I'm gonna go have to play with a birthday toy now. . .

(I'm reading that vampire book you recommended :-) )

Jay said...

Jeez, stay away from my grandma!

polyergos said...

i'm sorry i missed your birthday. happy belated.

Candace said...

No worries, Jay. :-)

Thanks, P! :-)