Wednesday, November 08, 2006

The One With Dorque in the Title

Regarding the election results, I'm with Blonde, but I choose to be shot by hot guys. ;)

[/political commentary]

I do love Caller ID. We are getting so many "Toll Free" and "Out of Area" calls that it's ridiculous. But we've hit on a new strategy and are having fun, too. It goes like this:

*ring ring*
(we all run around looking for the phone, which is never on its base)
"TOLL FREE!" the winning child gleefully announces

and then like this:

Slug: Is my pizza ready yet? I've been waiting 2 hours.

Dorque #1: Hello? May I speak to Candace __________

Slug: Isn't this Pizza Hut?

Dorque #1: No

Slug: OK, bye bye! *hangs up*


Mollusc: Hello?

Dorque #2: Hello, may I please speak to Can--

Mollusc: Raahhhhrr rahhr rahhr rhaar

Dorque #2: *silence*

This is great! My kids get to have all the fun of prank phone calls without imposing on anyone's personal time or privacy!

Next time, Sluggie plans to answer in Korean. "Yobuseyo?"


Egan said...

I get the sense you're tired of talking politics. That's so sad.

Candace said...

Haha!! Isn't it though?

But not pants. Between your blog and Winters's there's of pants talk going on. Go Pants!


IUD leg?? O_o

Egan said...

Inter Uterine Device for the leg? Huh, that's a great way of birth control. Too bad I don't have fishies exiting the leg or a uterus.

Candace said...

I think the closest I can get with fish and leg is fishnet stockings.

I'm watching a film with Emma and Mr. Knightly AND Miss Elizabeth Bennet. Oh, and Mr. Collins, too!!! Very surreal.
Name that film.

Also with the baddie from Die Another Day. How very disorienting.

SighsofmyLife said...

You'll like one of Jess's responses. She puts on a (very fake) Japanese accent and says:

Hello, Pizza Hut Japan. Our special today is sushi pizza. May I take your order?

Stops them every time. Of course, if it really were Pizza Hut Japan, they wouldn't be speaking English!

ARM said...

That's classic. I did that with my cat once - she is a very talkative cat. So one day we got a telemarketer and I put the phone next to her while she was meowing for her food. The person on the other end of the phone says "Hello?...." and then to someone else "I think it's a cat..." I had to hang up because I was dying at that moment.

Well, it was funny then, anyway.

Candace said...

Sighs, that's great!! My kids are dying over that one. :)

ARM - OMG, that's funny!!! The weird part is that just this morning we were talking about having Ennie (our own talkative cat) do her thing on the phone, LOL!

treespotter said...

you should install a word verification on your phone. it works.


snavy said...

So, your kids have invented prank answering?? I love it!!!

~d said...

Dude-I love it when a bill collector or some as equally as appealing calls and asks for whomever...I will say, Hold on ONE moment, please!
and then I hang up.
if they call back I apologize-I am so sorry I hung up on you. Hold on ONE moment please! (and I hang up again!)

~d heart your kids!

Jaichan said...

That's great! When I lived in Japan the first time, I worked in an office building in downtown Tokyo. My friends and I would have fun in the elevator, like posing in attack stance at the door, or each of us would stand in the corners, facing the walls.
It would freak the hell out of everyone.

Egan said...

Janice, I know exactly what you mean. I love the attack stance. You're my long lost sister aren't you?

Candace said...

Tree, now THAT would be handy!

Snavy - they can't wait for the phone to ring now, LOL!

~d - that's a good one! I may use that one myself!

Jaichan - OMG, LOL! I would love to see that. :)

Egan - I thought you would approve, considering your FKT today.

ldbug said...

You have creative kids! They crack me up, that's great:-)

Egan said...

It's like Janice and I share a brain and a language. So weird I tell you, so weird.

Slade said...

I love this! How much fun is that! I know this is going to sound cheesy, but this is something that your kids will a family memory--how cool is that!

tshsmom said...

Z has been fielding those calls at our house too. Unfortunately, it's hard to be creative when the call is a recording. :(

Jaichan said...

Well, Egan, you do love to swim. So I think it's pretty obvious we're brother and sister. Just from different parents.
I'm going to try some of your tricks, Candace, next time someone calls here.
Lizzie, my roomie, worked as a call centre drone and she handles them very well. She's so polite in her brush off they sometimes start to cry.
It's great.

Candace said...

Ldbug - Thanks. :) Who knew that solicitors could be so much fun?

Egan - that is weird. I wonder if Jaichan has a chili-pepper G-string like yours. Well, Jai?

Slade - I hope you're right. :)

Tshsmom - yeah, the recordings take all the fun out of it. :-P

Jaichan - Lizzie is my new hero. :) And how strange that both you and Egan enjoy stirring lakes. ;)

Anonymous said...

'Tis better to employ the written word than to rely on the evil witchcraftery of the electric telephone, C.

Candace said...

You are so right. Speaking of written words, folks, there are a couple of hours left to go vote on the stories in a blog I should have pimped days ago.

Egan said...

I'm fairly certain we were twins separated at birth. I will talk to my mom tonight.