I found a really fun book at the library today. It's packed with great tips on things like Entertaining the Elderly, including a recipe for "I Remember the War Cube Steak," which invites you to take a cube steak and "bang it with a mallet until it is riddled with pockmarks," and the BRITTLE diet (Bananas, Raisins, Ice milk, Turnips, Tomato juice, Lentils, Escarole.)
The section on children's games had me in stitches, especially the part on Gerneral Party Game Safety, which reads in one breathless paragraph:
"If for any reason a child's clothing catches fire, prevent the child from running because this adds oxygen, causing him to burn more quickly. Roll the smoldering child on the ground or in a rug. If a youngster breaks though the ice, have him kick his feet and wriggle to a solid surface. Kerosene is an accelerant: try not to mix it with an open flame unless an escape route is cleared. Stay in single file. Don't scratch, and don't ever put that in your mouth. The eyes are the most vulnerable part of a wolf. When cornered, jab something pointy into this area."
There are plenty of fun game suggestions (play "Grown-Up" and Social Services), hundreds of off-colour 70's photographs straight out of your grandmother's handy housewife book, and a plethora of recipes. Now, I'm not so sure about these recipes. It's kind of like reading the Onion back when I was a student on the Madison campus during its startup days. I never knew if the coupons were for real, and I was too chicken to ask.
I don't know who Amy Sedaris is, but I have this nagging feeling that I ought to and that perhaps if my television got channels I might. What I do know is that she makes me laugh. A lot. ^_^ Click the pic and check her out.