Thursday, May 18, 2006

42s and HNT

The Answers

1) True - can't type properly.

2) My middle name starts with Q
False. My middle name is Dominique. OK, not really, but it does start with a D, but it's not nearly as exotic as Dominique. And my last name is not Francon.

3) My initial college coursework was in Computer Science
Yes, I was going to be a CoDe MuNKi. I switched to advertising mostly because I hated Calculus and love words yet saw no future in getting an Eng degree. Ironically, now I think math is cool and HATE most advertising.

4) I've gone on 1 date in my life and not with my husband
True. Mostly I like to play with boys over girls, so I was always hanging out with them and eventually married the one that was my best friend.

5) My last child was born at home between the fireplace and the Christmas tree
True. (Yay huh, Jay? :-) ) Dagny (aka The Prawn) was born at home in the living room. (on purpose) One of the first things she saw was the twinkly Christmas lights on our tree. :-)

6) The doctor just made it for the birth of my 3rd child
False. He made it for the placenta, but not for Gogo. Fortunately, the nurse on call was a lovely English lady who had been a midwife in England and was a way better delivery assistant than the Dr., who, tragically, was born without a personality.

7) I once punched a clown at Dh's office party
I'm not a violent person. (No! Really!!!) But of all my fibs, this is the one I most wish were true. It would be such a cool story. Maybe I'll write a story about this and do a Kay-style post. (Soul Thoughts of a Troubled Actor over there in the sidebar --> )

8) I've spoken with Douglas Adams
True. At a book signing. He was one of the wittiest people I've ever heard speak. I always describe him as a British Robin Williams because he was a toned-down version - quick wit, without the hyperactivity. Tragically I was too awed (or odd) to say anything even remotely interesting to him. I just turned bright red as I told him the next book was also mine and wished desperately that I could think of someting really cool to say.

9) I stayed at Bradley Grieve's house (aka The Blue Day Book guy)
True. We knew each other in Hong Kong as kids. At one point we switched houses for a week - employing organisation's idea of a "vacation." My mother hated it because they lived in an apartment and we lived in a house with a big yard and jungle all around. (luck of the draw due to us living on campus where my dad taught) My mother has always loathed apartments. Their toaster threw the toast on the floor, which my sister and I found delightful.

10) I failed 3rd grade art class
Sadly, this is true. Apparently I suck at macrame and crocheting.

11) I had a torrid affair with a university professor
False, Gutter Boy's comment notwithstanding.

12) My high school graduation was on my 17th birthday
So boring it must be true, and is.

13) I can tie a knot in a cherry stem using only my tongue
True. Have you ever met anyone who can't?

14) I've only ever bonked one guy
True. Fortunately for dh that one IS him.

15) I love Catcher in the Rye
FALSE!!! It actually bothered me to type that I liked it. Plah, plah, plah!!!!! Utter dreck.

16) I used to fix military jets
By now you likely all know that's true. A-10s and F-16s.

17) I once worked at a rat farm

18) I worked one summer as a boobie drinks girl at a golf course

19) I accidentally ended up in the classes for problem children in 8th grade

20) My left elbow is the wrong shape due to an accident when I was 8

21) I was hit by a car while trying to unicycle in a parking lot
False, but only by the grace of God, LOL! And I prolly did hit a few cars myself.

22) I can sleep anywhere, including attached by a comm cord to a running jet
Why yes I can. Quiet Gutter Boy - no additional examples required. And I wasn't being bad. It was a practice war (looooong days) and the pilot said I could after the preflight and he'd wake me up for launch. Nice guy. :-)

23) I once went to the wrong final exam in Univ but was too embarrassed to leave, so signed a false name and took the test anyway (Organic Chem)
False, though it's something that *could* have happened, LOL! As it was, I did sit through a lecture that wasn't mine and learned a lot of icky things about drug testing on animals for determining toxicity levels. :-(

24) The car broke down on the way to my last university final and I was 1/2 an hour late
True. Bloody Chevette!

25) I once shot "Expert Marksman" with a rifle not my own
True. Stock (hee hee) Air Force rifle, standard shooting requalification.

26) I once chased down a pursesnatcher (he was apprehended but not by me)
True. I was working at a daycare and saw a guy grab one of the mom's purses out of a car. I took off after him (barefoot),was joined by a pregnant coworker and we chased him across a football field and gravel road and through a construction area where we sicced the big construction dudes on him. :-)

27) I kicked a guy in the nuts once. On purpose. He deserved it.
Wouldn't this have been great as part of the clown story? But it's false. Told you, I'm not a violent person.

28) I've been on the USS Enterprise
True. It's really, really BIG, but the doorways are really, really small.

29) I met "Scotty" once at a convention in Indiana
False. Never been to any kind of Sci-Fi convention.

30) I played "God" in a school play in grade school and felt it was sacrilegious but did what I was told. I got a big laugh and was shocked at the audience's lack of respect.
True. (Happy Kitkat? :-) ) In retrospect it must've sounded pretty goofy. I was hiding under the lectern being the voice of "God" when he called "Samuel. Samuel. SAMUEL!!!!"

31) I was once attacked by monkeys
True. No surprise.

32) I was once attacked by a clown
False, but it would be a fantastic pretense for kicking one in the nuts.

33) I once fed a popsicle to a bear cub
True. One of Gutter Monkey's cousins has a mini personal zoo in Iowa. Cougars, wolves, marble and arctic foxes, bears, etc.

34) My kids and I hold the record at the DeForest, WI library for # of books checked out

35) Our local library has waived the 100 book per card limit for us on several occasions because we're homeschoolers
Also true.

36) I've never had a late book fine
Ha! With all those books you think I'd never miss a due date?

37) I gave formula to one or more of my children one or more times
Nope. Nevah.

38) Cloth diapers all the way, baby!
Crunchy mommy.

39) I heart my Diva cup and don't know what I'd do without it (boys and squeamish girls ought not to click)
Boys, turn away. This does not concern you or your ilk.
Girls - it's true. I can kick my ass off and never worry. The bonus is that dying from TSS isn't an issue. Plus those bastages who make the chemical-laden crap that's on the market are TOTAL price gougers. Oh yeah - cuts down on duration and cramping, too. Yay! :-) And Gutter Munki never has to buy feminine products for me, LOL!


Well poo! Fal has reminded me that it's HNT day and ANNIVERSARY HNT at that. I have to get ready and go teach in 5 mins and have no new pic. I'll post the 1st one (as instructed) and try to sneak a celebratory one in under the wire tonight. We'll see. A bunch of TKDers are coming over for a late supper after class, so it's gonna be a late night, LOL!

Ah, yes, here's the first one:

I guess this could be considered (hopefully) celebrating my last Thursday as a Jr. Red belt.


tshsmom said...

I got 9 right!
Thanks for the explainations.

tshsmom said...

Almost forgot; so glad to hear that you hate Catcher in the Rye too!!

jackt said...

Hey Candace Dominatrix! (I got your middle name right didn't I?). I thought the teachers grade the tests and tell people the results! How come you didn't publish my score even though I played!!! :)

Toby said...

I read Catcher in the Rye for my first time only a few months ago. I liked it, but it is not worthy of all the hype. After I finished I knew why it was not required reading in my high school.

Nice shot Candace!

Candace said...

TSmom, CONGRATULATIONS!!!with 9 right you win the urn of clown ashes!!!! :-) Great job! Hah - a fellow loather! :-)

Jack, with 5 right, you took second place! Not too shabby!! You win the right to send me a picture of you lightsaber fighting in your underwear! :-) Lucky boy! OK, I'm not obsessed, I just bring it up every time I talk to you. ;-)
I think I may change my middle name to Dominatrix. I like the soud of that. :-)

Toby, It WAS required reading in my HS, and I'm pretty sure the teacher saw all the swearing and decided if he assigned it the kids would think he was cool. He was wrong. I re-read it years after HS and still didn't like it. But I hear people talk about loving it. Go figure.

Which shot? Thank you. If it's the almost boobie shot, that's my First ever HNT, if it's the sidekick, -ack! It was HARD (especially on like the 15th try) to hold it for long enough for dh to get the shot, LOL! Maybe next time I'll stretch out first and have him take an action shot so I can get more height, LOL!

Kitkat you got 2 right, but you only guessed a few, so your %age wasn't shabby either. ;-)

missy said...

I'm home birth, too!

Anonymous said...

I liked Catcher....oh well.

Say, that Diva thing looks kinda cool. Should I believe all the "testimony" on there?

Jay said...

Oh, I am so stoked, stoked (and I haven't said the word stoked in like 14 years, just to give you some idea of how stoked I really am) that #5 was true.

Candace said...

Cool, Missy! Your mom was ahead of her time! I think that's pretty rare for our generation!

Kitkat - well, diff people like diff things. :-) As for the Diva, OMG you should believe every single positive thing you ever hear about it!

Jay - LOL! That one made my day. :-)

Niel said...

you met Mr Adams... i am licking the screen now.

and shame on you for dissing salinger! You love C-in-the-R, you just don't know it yet!

onlyforher said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Logophile said...

OMG I am jealous you got to meet him, even if it was in passing and you didn't blow him away with your stunning wit. Given better circumstances you would have.
Very good list and that is a great pic of you, the current HNT.
Liking the new avatar too.

Candace said...

Niel, you clearly have your priorities straight! Good man! :-)

Logo™, I'm jealous of me, too. I wish I could go back and be that me again(รก la Vonnegut's Billy Pilgrim)only wittier. Thanks! I had fun (and got sore butt muscles) making the pics.:-)