Phantom Menace of the Opera, Part the Fourth

I'm taking votes on the Phantom board as to whether Raoul lives or dies in this version. Feel free to add your own votes in the comments section. (please do - my blog is lonely!) This one is a little short - still working. . . I'm also making a birthday cake for the Prawn. Four years ago today, she was born at home between the fireplace and the Christmas tree. :o) Uh-oh - Sluggie is drawing on my back. Prawn got to open 1 present early and opened the crayons for drawing on skin. We've been decorating each other all day.

Oh yeah - ten points to Gryffindor (or the house of your choice) if you can name Obi-Wan's song and the movie from which it came. Also, an additional 5 points for understanding the relevance of the Random Scottish Girl.

******

INSTALLMENT IV

PHANTOM is on the roof, having overheard the whole RAOUL/CHRISTINE thing and looking like he’s been kicked in the stomach because that little hussy -- **ahem, excuse me.** Fortunately for us all, Jar-Jar Binks enters stage right and. . .

JAR-JAR
Christine!! Oh Christiiiiine! Mesa so tryinta find you!

PHANTOM
(Steps out of the shadows, cape swirling, in front of Jar-Jar)
Who are YOU?!

JAR-JAR
Mesa Jar-Jar Binks. Mesa so smilin’ ta see yousa!

PHANTOM
(frowning, obviously confused)
What??

JAR-JAR
Mesa lookinta find dat singin’ girl.

PHANTOM
(slowly, clearly, a bit loudly)
Parlez-vous Francais?

JAR-JAR
Whassa dat yousa sayin’?

PHANTOM
Sprechen Sie Deutsch?

JAR-JAR
Mesa no knowin what yousa sayin’ Meesta Swirly Cape.

PHANTOM
Jong-wen? Espanol? Hanguk? Italiano?

Jar-Jar
Mesa muy muy lovin’ Miss Christine!


A look of rage slowly crosses PHANTOM’S face as he realizes what JAR-JAR is saying. He pulls out the lightsaber and ignites it, looking dangerously at JAR-JAR.

JAR-JAR
(clueless, of course)
Oooooh! Pretty!

PHANTOM lunges forward, swiftly and gracefully carving the Gungan into tiny little pieces. It is a thing of utmost beauty to behold.

CUT TO OPERA HOUSE BALLROOM - INT, NIGHT


CHORUS/CANTINA CROWD
Masquerade!
Different species on parade
Masquerade!
Hide your face so the Sith will never find you
Masquerade!
Every face a different shade
Masquerade!
Look around, there's another clone behind you.

Flash of red, splash of blue
Lord and Sith, old is new
Green and black, Yoda’s back
Trace of scales, face of Dak
Faces!
Take your turn, take a ride
On the merry-go-round
In an inhuman race
Chrome and gold, dome of blue
True is false, who is who?
Lekku swing, nexus slash
Neighbours clash, sabers flash
Faces!
Drink it in, drink it up
Till you've drowned
In the light
In the sound

CHRISTINE and RAOUL
But who can name the face?

CHRISTINE
Think of it! A secret engagement!

RAOUL
But why is it secret?

RANDOM SCOTTISH GIRL
(dancing past)
Girls LOVE secrets, Frankie!

RAOUL
Frankie?

CHRISTINE
Oh, look! It’s Obi-Wan!

OBI-WAN
Though I am nothing to her
Though she must rarely look at me
And though I could never woo her
I love her till I die.

CHRISTINE and OBI-WAN
Surely you heard My Lady
Go down the garden singing
Silencing all the songbirds
And setting the alleys ringing...

OBI-WAN places his hand on CHRISTINE’S shoulder. She falters and falls silent. Raoul puts his hand to his sword – or would but it isn’t there.

OBI-WAN (Cont.)
But surely you see My Lady
Out in the garden there
Rivaling the glittering sunshine
With a glory of golden hair.

* * *

Click here for Part V



Don't forget to vote!